i’m going to be honest. this past week has been rough. every lie from the enemy that could seep into my spirit, did! i have recently thought and pondered, “Lord, every time someone asks me about my job status (or lack thereof), i tell them ‘i am currently unemployed, but God has been faithful and sustaining!’ ” in my dark times, i still give You the glory. yet, i am still unemployed and feel like a failure. i feel like a failure because i continue to tell everyone what a GREAT God i serve, who sustains, provides, and longs to bless me..yet, i feel like my unemployment reflects otherwise. i don’t want that! i want everything in my life to reflect the simple fact that You are the source of EVERYTHING!
prove Yourself. wait. did i just tell God to prove Himself? yeah..i did! during the night last night i was crying out to God in prayer and those two words, i blurted out! i felt like a chief priest on the day of Jesus’ crucifixion. (Matthew 27:41 “41So also the chief priests, with the scribes and elders, mocked him, saying,42 “He saved others; he cannot save himself. He is the King of Israel; let him come down now from the cross, and we will believe in him.”) conviction fell on me like a ton of bricks. my God proves Himself EVERY moment of my life. allowing me to wake up with air in my lungs. having the strength and ability to mow the lawn for my parents (honoring my father and mother). a roof over my head. a car to drive. food on the table. immeasurable wealth compared to much of the world …and the list goes on.
so yes, i can look at other people’s situations and see them rising to success right out of college. but i must remind myself, i am exactly where i am suppose to be, doing what i am suppose to be doing. i am grateful for the position that i am in. “gratitude gravitates toward blessings.” – bishop paul lanier.
i feel much better after writing this out. i hope it encouraged you if you have went through something similar. HE is there…in your current situation! thank you for reading and allowing me to get through the pity party and remember the promise!
– tony // @AsToldByTony